My mind wouldn’t stray from the thought of her, for months and months and months. My stupid, stupid brain – shut up already. Ooh, I love beating myself up sometimes, caving in to old, repetitive thought processes. Thought process that serves me no purpose whatsoever.
“Hmm… I wonder if we’ll see each other again.”
“I want to sleep with her so bad.”
“I want to know her more, just as a friend.”
“I want to spend more time together.”
A year ago we had spent a few days together, it was palpably the start of something, it was raw animalistic sex, it was something to remember. We’ve not really talked for months and months. It’s sad to see and feel something that could have at least been a good friendship turn into absolutely nothing.
Perhaps seeing a collapse in my parents’ communication when I was a little boy set me up not to be able to deal with no communication when I want to communicate. Perhaps it’s something we are all not good at coping with – that moment when someone shuts the door on us with no reason – it hits our ego, it hits that place where suddenly time is finite and you can’t fathom why someone could cut you out of their life so callously. We begin to question ourselves to as why they did it, wishing for more time with them. It’s as if the relationship died and now we have to make sense of it.
As humans, we get into these repetitive thought patterns about someone or something, and they really can take away from your creative and loving power.
How can you help yourself out of this situation?
– Ask yourself what you’ve learned.
From this situation, I’ve learned that I want genuinely loving relationships. It doesn’t mean commitment to marriage and kids, it just means that if we are going to be physical, I want there to be a baseline friendship there from the start, and I want it to continue, so we get to know each other more and more. I now tell women I meet that this is important to me, to grow our relationship in some way, shape or form. What are you learning from your situation?
– Realize that all the deeper power is within you and you are creating all of this.
There really is no power in anyone else, it is you the one who assigns them that power with your emotions and thoughts. It’s your thoughts that give them power, and ultimately none of it is real. It’s all made up, a creation of your consciousness. You are infinitely loving, and you are creating a limited viewpoint of which you are living out in your mind. Here is an actual process you can do (it’s taken from the book ‘Busting Loose From the Money Game’ – a highly recommended book).
First of all… dive into the dark feeling and feel it at the peak of intensity and say the following:
I am creating this (describe what you have created in your mind)
It’s not real! (Feel the meaning)
It’s completely made up! (Feel the meaning)
It’s a creation of my consciousness! (Feel the meaning)
I reclaim my power from this creation NOW!
As I reclaim the power, I feel it coming back to me (feel it)
I feel it surging through me (really feel it)
As I feel the surge, I feel myself expanding more and more into who I really am. Expressing more and more of who I really am in my human experience I am unstoppable, infinitely loving and infinitely abundant with all the things I want.
Next: Fully appreciate how amazing you had to be to create this, and convince yourself it was real, and how amazing the creation was.
– Communicate as best you can.
You might have an obsessive thought inside a relationship, about a person who won’t communicate, about a past love… Whatever it is, reclaim the power first and then communicate from your higher self. For me, I’ve communicated that I fundamentally want to get to know her more, somehow. At least she knows, she can take it or leave it. For you, communicate what you really want – even if it shows you are vulnerable. Do not beg for contact if he or she is shutting communication down, just communicate what you want from a place of love.
– Let it go and love yourself even more.
If he or she has no desire to connect with you, you have to open your heart and let it go. Sometimes people cannot connect in the way that you want them to, even as friends. It’s a tricky one to deal with, especially as I personally believe we are all fundamentally here to connect with one another – the thing is, even through disconnection and chaos, we are still connected. We always will be.
Finally, you must realize that you really have no idea what’s going or has gone on in this person’s life. The chances are you don’t know them that well or they weren’t completely honest with you in the first place. If you know them and they were honest with you, you wouldn’t be in this situation now.
Good luck! The biggest thing to remember is that you are limiting yourself with all of this, when you are actually born to expand and be infinite. You really are.
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